Archive for October, 2008
Romantic Relationships in Ethiopia (Still a Mystery to Me)
Monday, October 27th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments
My Bible Study group is mostly single people in their mid 20s to mid 30s so when we got into a long discussion about romantic relationships in Ethiopia I was all ears. People in Ethiopia tend to get married around the age that most people are in my Bible Study. It’s a bit later than it sometimes is in the states. This is because people (especially men) usually want to secure a job and maybe even a house before they can marry. This definitely takes time here. It also means that sometimes relationships last a long time before they turn into marriage (one extreme example was 8 years).
Also, sometimes people don’t bring home their girlfriend or boyfriend until they have already decided to marry them. One person said that someone they knew dated the same girl for 3-4 years before his family found out about her, and that was when he told his family that he was going to marry her.
A sad fact about marriages in Ethiopia is that over 75% of them have some form of domestic violence. The ironic thing is a lot of these marriages are founded in some form of Christianity. Did the husbands read Ephesians 5—that husbands should love their wives as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her? If they did, maybe they missed what it means, because it certainly doesn’t mean to beat your wife!!
Interestingly enough, over half of my church population is made up of single people. I wonder why that is. As single people do we just particularly gravitate towards this church? Are we afraid to commit ourselves to more serious relationships? I don’t know, the possibilities are endless, but I’m still curious.
Aside from all this, I discovered that I might be from a different culture but when it comes to what women want in a man they hope to marry, we pretty much want the same things—romance, a man who is seriously committed to God, will adore us for who we are, we talked to us like a best friend would, etc. Across the world, women pretty much want the same things.
GRACE, or lack thereof
Monday, October 27th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments
After being spoiled by a church that always preaches the gospel of Grace, I have found myself lacking grace in my own life, particularly here in Ethiopia. The two major religions in Ethiopia do not seem to contain much grace at all, if any. They are very rule based, as if salvation came from following rules. It feels the same way sometimes at my job—very Pharisaical. I have heard missionaries say that after asking a group of pastors how people are saved their answer was “by following the law”. Perhaps this is why recently recovered prostitutes who have walked away from that lifestyle have a difficult time being accepted in churches here. These churches seem to not preach or promote grace very often.
I think GRACE is hard for us to grasp. Everything in our world disconfirms its existence. Very few people just get handed things for free in this life. They always have to work towards something to get what they want, and grace is the polar opposite. Grace says that I don’t have to earn what I need desperately. In fact, I don’t even have to do a thing to deserve it. I just have it for FREE! Amazing!
Fortunately, there are still ways that I can hold onto God’s Grace here…like reading Redeeming Love (a novel based on the book of Hosea) for the second time, reading Hosea 2 and being amazed at God’s amazing, compassionate love on his beloved Israel who has prostituted herself so many times, listening to sermons from home. For myself, sometimes I find the grace of God is too good to be true, and then I realize that the reason that it brings me to tears so often is because it is true and I need it desperately.
How I Teach Kids English (In Case You Wanted To Know : )
Monday, October 27th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments
A friend from home asked me How I teach kids English and the first word that came to mind is CREATIVELY!!!! When teaching English to five year old kids with short attention spans, I have to have a lot of tricks up my sleeve. So, I read stories about the current unit we are studying. I do puppet shows with two sock puppets named Sam and Sally, showing the students how to make a conversation. I have students talk with students around them. And I use a pocket chart and TONS of visual aids. Not to mention songs which are so valuable for learning a language. So, yeah, that’s about it. I still have a lot more to learn about teaching kids, but I think what I’m doing so far is effective.
My Second Time At The Center For Women
Sunday, October 5th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments
Before I say more about this, the center for women is the place that I wrote about in my very first letter to all of you.
I am not able to go there very often since I work full time, but I had three days off this week and decided to go and help with the English classes that are taught on Wednesdays. I taught songs to the women there to help them remember the letter sounds in English and days of the week. I’m always amazed at how the women are so sweet and fun to be with. They’ve been through sooo much!!!
I heard Amharic a lot that day. Hearing so much of it was a mixed blessing. I was able to understand more words than I did last time (about 20!), but I still have so much further to go when it comes to learning this language.
It was a privilege to be in the presence of this ministry again. I have so many wishes of being further involved in the future but we’ll see what G. says as the year goes on.
Please Pray for B. Who Is HIV Positive and Has A Daughter
Sunday, October 5th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments
When I was at The Center For Women for the second time, I saw and heard about a woman there who just found out that she is HIV positive and is taking it rather hard. She wanted to get plastic surgery done on her face because she has burn scars. In order for this to happen, she had to take a HIV test. The test came out positive and now we’re not sure if she will get to have this surgery done.
She has a 2 or 3 year old daughter who is fortunately HIV NEGATIVE!! YAY!! Hopefully B. will be able to continue to care for her daughter. Fortunately ARV (anti-retroviral drugs—the drugs that have enabled Magic Johnson to live with HIV for so long without being really sick) drugs are free to her here in Ethiopia. This is a tremendous blessing as those can be expensive!!
In spite of it all, this is difficult news and definitely means a huge change in B.’s life. Please pray that she would be able to cope with this news in a healthy way and that it would bring her closer to God! And that if it’s God’s will, that she would be able to get plastic surgery done safely! Thank you for your prayers, on behalf of B!
One Of My Students Died : (
Sunday, October 5th, 2008 | Uncategorized | 1 Comment
When I came back after my 5 day weekend I found out that one of my students was killed in a car accident. At first I didn’t remember her, but then someone told me her name and what class she was in and I started to remember. Her name was Yanet (the Ethiopian version of my mom’s name Janet which brought it home to me that much more) and she was about 4 or 5 years old. In some ways she reminded me of myself when I was her age. She was very quiet in class. Sometime her teachers weren’t sure if she was really understanding all that they taught, but then she would perform almost perfectly on her exams. I was very much like this as a child…quiet and observant, taking it all in and trying to perform perfectly in school and at home. I hope Yanet is in a better place. I honestly don’t know.
Her father and little sister were also in the car and came out of the accident with minor injuries. It turns out that one of my friends at church used to work with her mom. Losing someone I know in a car accident kind of reminded me of a friend of mine who was killed in a car accident on a medical missions trip. There are never, ever good reasons for why children die, no matter how young or old. I don’t understand it, except that I know that our world is rather messed up and therefore horrible things happen that cannot always be easily explained.
Rest In Peace, little Yanet and may your pregnant mom, dad, and little sister be comforted at this time by His Grace.
HAVE A MICE DAY—There Was A Mouse In Our Kitchen!!!
Sunday, October 5th, 2008 | Uncategorized | 1 Comment
I hate rodents of all shapes and sizes. A few weeks ago I thought that maybe I was dreaming when I saw one run from our stove to our refrigerator, but I was not. Today, C. saw a black, furry mouse run into the kitchen and into our stove. It turns out that there was a mouse making his (or her?) home in part of our stove. YUCK!!! (I’m not sure how it survived the heat from the stove)
So, I stayed in my room and waited for my security guard, roommate, and maid to kill it. I can kill insects. I can face certain animals being in my house, but when it comes to rodents being in my home I am at a loss! Something about their little tails, feet, I don’t know I just don’t like them! So, now we are a mouseless house I hope unless the now deceased mouse told his friends and family about his warm home in our stove. Oh dear!!! And to top it off I’m working on a cross stitch project right now that is titled “Have A Mice Day” with little mice eating food all over it. I will never look at that project the same again!
The Honeymoon Stage of Moving Here Has Ended
Sunday, October 5th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments
As in every relationship, every move (especially a move to a different country) has a honeymoon stage that eventually ends. That means that everything that I once thought was so wonderful and couldn’t be better, is now normal and sometimes annoying. At times it is a bit sad. The reality that I will be here for the next year without hopes of coming home until next summer is hitting me. I have to make do with this place. I have to make the most of it. I have to get used to that which I don’t always like and somehow make it work for me. As you can probably tell, I’m in process and it’s not always comfortable!
I feel poured out. God has asked me to go to a new place, feel the pain of leaving my home, feel the pain of not being used to a new place, feel the pain of being uncomfortable with a language in every encounter. It’s amazing how much God calls me to FEEL. Sometimes I don’t like it. Sometimes I want to hide and not face it. Sometimes I feel sad and I cannot be consoled. But this is reality and I know that I will be that much more closer to God as I go through it. I just wish it wasn’t so painful sometimes!